Why won’t you MAGA people cooperate and freak out? Why won’t you accept that America is not only being defeated by the Iranians, but that Tel Aviv is on fire, that our ships are sinking, that we’re running out of bullets, and that everything is going to hell? I mean, sure, your lifetime of experience shows you that none of this is true, and you would be well aware that seventh-century savages from the Middle East are utterly incapable of competing against American or Israeli technology, martial skills, and firepower – exponentially less so when both of them are fully integrated, synchronized, and combined. But hey, you should still believe it anyway because, if you don’t, you clearly want to die for Israel or something.

You MAGA people also fail to understand that this campaign is a giant war crime, according to the same people who are also experts on COVID, tariffs, immigration law, and every other subject that happens to get raised on social media. I was just a Fortune 500 lawyer for 30 years, an Army colonel, and a graduate of the Army War College, but you know, I defer to the experience of @TurgidMassieLibertarian69 and his contention that you’re not allowed to attack an enemy frigate on the high seas because of reasons, and shut up, you love Israel. 

Oh yeah, we’re not supposed to die for Israel, according to a vast number of bots. It’s not clear what we are supposed to die for, and, frankly, we haven’t been doing that much dying at all lately. We lost six troops, and that’s awful – I’ve been there when we’ve lost soldiers, unlike most of the human dildos who are pretending to care about these casualties, so we can play the “Who cares more?” game if they like. But in World War II, there were single bursts of MG42 machine gun fire that killed more Americans than that. The notion that we could lose just six KIA in a war where we essentially decapitate the entire enemy government, wipe out its integrated air defense system, and systematically annihilate its ability to project combat power on land, sea, and air in about 48 hours is an astonishing achievement unprecedented in the annals of war. But, of course, the dumb people commenting on it haven’t studied the annals of war. All they’ve studied are Reddit and the tweets of fellow mental defectives.

Yeah, there are critics of the war who do know what they’re talking about, and they deserve to have their views considered carefully. Some are my friends, and they’re still my friends because I know their concerns come from a place of patriotism, not ignorance or grift. When someone intelligent tells you something different than what you think, you should listen, even if you don’t eventually accept his point of view. But the problem here is fake smart people.

I am informed by all the fake smart people that this war is destroying the MAGA coalition, that America First is going down the tubes, not because Donald Trump has started a war, but because he has initiated the process of finishing a war started by degenerate freaks who’ve been maiming and murdering Americans for 47 years. You know, there’s nothing that American First voters hate more than whacking people who have blown apart and killed thousands of Americans. Or at least, that’s what they tell you. “I didn’t vote for another forever war!” they bleat. Newsflash – none of us did. Another newsflash – this isn’t a forever war. This is going to go on for a little while, and then we’re going to win it when somebody emerges to take over who’s not going to carry on the jihad against us. 

And guess what happens when we win it? Well, then we’ve won. And nothing succeeds like success.

But wait, the stock market is experiencing jitters! The Dow is not at 50,000 anymore! It’s only at 48,000! Oh no, there goes my walk-in humidor. And wait, the price of oil went up $10! Oh man, all the climate change hoaxers are really upset because fossil fuel is less affordable – wait what? And you know what’s going to happen soon to the price of oil? It’s going to go down again. The war is going to be over, and the oil is going to be flowing freely, and they’re going to be blubbering that it’s too darn cheap.

The critics act like these risks never occurred to Trump, as if no one in the entire administration imagined that the enemy might try to close the Straits of Hormuz, or that the stock market might get jittery. Man, nobody saw that coming, nobody except some Internet rando tweeting from the basement of his mom‘s townhouse in Bumtugger, Illinois! My favorite newsflash of the pre-war era was the startling disclosure that the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff had explained to Donald Trump that there are risks that Trump should consider when deciding whether to launch the strikes, as if a senior general warning the commander-in-chief about potential suboptimal outcomes were some unprecedented phenomenon unknown within the history of warfare. Who knew that competent senior officers might tell their boss how things could possibly go wrong? Well, anybody who’s ever served, or anybody who has not served but is not a drooling clinical moron.

Yes, Donald Trump was aware of the risks. He weighed them against the benefits and found the benefits sufficient to justify his bold, decisive action to lance this boil on the booty of the Middle East. Iran is not only a problem for the United States; it’s a problem for the whole world because Iran is in a tacit alliance with the Chinese. Iranian oil fuels the ChiComs. At the end of this conflict, we’re going to have our hands on Kharg Island and the Far East petrol spigot, which means we’ve got our hands around the throats of Xi and his Marxist cabal. No oil, no China. Yeah, they’ve got some supplies laid in. They can survive for a little while, and then everything shuts down. Maybe they can capture Taiwan before their stockpiles run out, or maybe not, but it doesn’t really matter. The stockpiles are going to run out eventually, and then the cars, trucks, and trains are going to stop, and the Chinese people are going to start starving. If you know anything about history – and very few people associated with social media know anything about history – you know that the Chinese people get very, very revolutionary when they get very, very hungry. 

Of course, by the time the CCP gets its comeuppance, the Cuban commies will have experienced their comeuppance. Some comeuppance is in order for Nicaragua, too. There’s a lot of comeuppance coming, and the MAGA folks are all here for it. Look at the polling. 82 percent of Trump 2024 voters are 100 percent behind Donald Trump on Iran. You would not know that from social media, because every pretender, grifter, fake, fraud, and puppet – sock and otherwise – is busy telling you how the MAGA coalition is falling apart. Oh no, we’ve lost Nick Fuentes, the avatar of the key sexually ambiguous midget demographic! Oh no, Candace Owens has taken a break from explaining how the saucer people and reverse vampires kidnapped Charlie Kirk and replaced him with a clone in conjunction with Erika Kirk and the Trilateral Commission to demand that our soldiers not fight because of the Jews or something. It’s always the Jews or something with these idiots. And Tucker? I just feel bad for Tucker. I like Tucker, and I think he’s had a mental break. I sincerely hope he gets the help he needs because what’s coming out of his mouth is simply crazy talk.

Even Donald Trump has had enough of these nuts, goofs, and demons. How do you argue that a bunch of aspiring social media choose-me-types are more MAGA than Mr. MAGA himself? Look, you can like Donald Trump, or you can not like Donald Trump, or you could’ve once liked Donald Trump and then stopped liking Donald Trump because somebody gave you a few hundred bucks, and that’s what your dignity costs, but at the end of the day, there is no MAGA without Donald Trump. He is simply the man. And, if you don’t agree with him, you’re not MAGA. You’re not America First. You’re probably some Democrat communist, sexually inadequate Never Trumper, an even more sexually inadequate libertarian, or some other brand of creep with a sketchy browser history, but, regardless, you don’t matter to MAGA.

Donald Trump understands the risk he’s taking for doing the right thing by ending this threat to the United States. Take a moment to think about what would happen if these apocalyptic jihadi perverts could stick a hot rock on top of a ballistic missile that could reach the United States. The same people crying and whining now like little female dog puppies would be crying and whining like little female dog puppies over the mushroom cloud rising above their hometown – though note that female dog puppies are loveable and should not be sent to Gitmo. Donald Trump is doing what has to be done, which is what men do, and that explains a lot why some of the male-identifying fake America Firsters are so upset. His manhood shames them. And it should.

Maybe his courageous actions will hurt Trump in the midterms. Maybe people will remember our inevitable victory over the mullahs as something to regret, instead of celebrate, in contradiction to all human nature and experience. Or maybe the economy won’t improve as much as we hope. Maybe people will be mad about which of the two flawed candidates for the Texas Senate Trump had to choose when he felt forced to choose between them in order to avoid a massive waste of money and a potential lost seat. Maybe people will completely forget how he closed the border, crushed DEI, got rid of the climate hoax, annihilated NPR, and kept countless other promises that Republicans have been making to us for years and yet have never kept.

But Trump's betting that we won’t forget all the winning. He’s betting that he will succeed and that America is going to be with him in the midterms. The smart money says that you should probably bet that way, too.

Follow Kurt on Twitter  @KurtSchlichter and read Kurt’s new bestseller in the Kelly Turnbull People’s Republic conservative action novel series, Panama Red. Also, check out his Kelly Turnbull GRAPHIC NOVEL campaign (with Sean Salter) – BLUE FLAME! Coming March 10 th!

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Editor's Note: For decades, former presidents have been all talk and no action. Now, Donald Trump is eliminating the threat from Iran once and for all. 

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