Winston Churchill once observed that there’s nothing quite like the feeling of being shot at and missed. The Republicans are enjoying that glorious sensation as we speak. Thanks to redistricting decisions in various courts as well as some surprising examples of GOP manhood in their wake, it looks like November is a jump ball. The midterms were supposed to be a rendezvous with disaster, and historically, the tides are still against us. But Democrats have just had the miserable experience of discovering that fate is fickle. Recent events have made it so that Republicans have a fighting chance, and our joy and relief that we’re not necessarily destined for doom is amplified by our delight in hearing Democrats squeal in agony as all their dreams die.

And that’s only the beginning of their pain. The 2026 midterms were going to be a small blip of hope for them before the Democrat success trend line dropped like Swalwell’s pants in the presence of a hard-five Chinese spy. Continuing population shifts will favor the Republicans. For example, migration from traditionally blue cities and states to more conservative red states will increase Republican representation in the House, as red states gain seats due to their population growth and Dems lose them as their future voter base gets deported. This shift will also result in more Electoral College votes for Republicans,  strengthening their position in the coming presidential elections. The future is so bright, the GOP’s gotta wear shades.

But, as long as the Democrats keep wearing those p-hats and the occasional Nazi tattoo, they’re going to keep losing. The South is nearly solid red. Republican legislatures are eliminating many of the racist, reserved Democrat districts (though soft Republicans might spare some districts for now, when the GOP pols get Indianaed next primary season, they’ll get harder). These weren’t black districts. They were Democrat districts. But it’s nice to see Democrats pretend to be interested in their black voter........

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