Many parents of struggling adult children describe a similar tension-filled cycle to me. Their stuck grown daughter or son seems to understand that something has to change for their life to move forward. But nothing actually changes.

These stuck adult children tell you they are "researching" possible options. They tell you (and themselves) that they are going to send out resumes or go places to apply for jobs—but they don't. Maybe they mean well when they say they're looking into a certificate program or enrolling in college. You think this time they'll do it, but they don't. Or they start applying for that job or educational program, but don't follow up.

Are you tired of the conversations that go in circles? Believe it or not, your adult child isn't loving them either. Are you exasperated because your logic and reassurance don't stick when you have the heart to have talks with your adult child?

If you listen closely in those conversations, I bet you hear some "What Ifs" from your adult child. If you sense or actually hear those "What Ifs," then you now have a window into their overthinking. And, those two words, "What If," turn plans into........

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