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Eric Schmitt Deserves to Be Mocked Forever

In this week’s Elie v. U.S., our justice correspondent relives the senator’s glorious face-plant. Plus: why John Roberts also deserves our mockery.

Senator Eric Schmitt (R-MO) during his disastrous questioning of former special counsel Jack Smith.

If it were up to me, Missouri Senator Eric Schmitt’s monumental face-plant would play in a constant loop on all television networks until he resigned in shame and disgrace. Schmitt fully debased himself during Senate hearings designed to torture former special counsel Jack Smith, and I simply don’t think he should be allowed to have a public life after his incompetent performance.

For the uninitiated: During the hearing on Tuesday, Schmitt alleged that Smith and Fulton County District Attorney Fani Willis were partners in a grand conspiracy to “get” Donald Trump. Willis’s assistant and paramour Nathan Wade was somehow involved. The “evidence” of this conspiracy was supposedly an Atlanta Hawks basketball game that Schmitt alleged Willis and Smith attended at State Farm Arena in Atlanta on February 3, 2024.

Just to state an obvious fact that has been somewhat overlooked during all of this: State Farm Arena seats over 17,500 people. If Smith and Willis had been at the same game at the same time, it would have meant literally nothing. Lt. Daniel Kaffee had more on Col. Nathan Jessup in A Few Good Men when all he had was “phone calls and footlockers.” It is beyond ridiculous to try to pin an entire illegal conspiracy on a freaking basketball game.

In any event, Smith said he never attended that game. Schmitt smugly declared that Smith had perjured himself. He claimed to have text messages from Smith confirming his planned attendance at the “Hawks” game.

Jack Smith, who in this moment officially became my top choice for attorney general once the Trump era finally ends, slowly figured out what was going on. I posted a picture on my social media of the moment Smith realized that Schmitt was confusing the Atlanta Hawks—a men’s professional basketball team—with the Iowa Hawkeyes, which represent the University of Iowa. (At Above the Law, Joe Patrice shared more Louvre-worthy pictures, mostly of Republicans realizing Schmitt is an idiot.) Smith testified that he attended a women’s basketball game in February 2024, but in Maryland, not Georgia, in order to see Hawkeyes great Caitlin Clark play.

Senator Amy Klobuchar put Schmitt’s mistake into the record, which prompted Schmitt to respond as men of his type often do when they’ve been exposed as frauds: He yelled at her. Schmitt then went on The Charlie Kirk Show (because for some reason that’s still a thing) claiming victory. Despite the unraveling of his entire conspiracy theory in real time on CSPAN, the white-wing media machine continued to push Schmitt’s provably false narrative.

In a normal world, this would be the end of Schmitt’s career. But, of course, it won’t be. It won’t be because lies and incompetence are not deal-breakers for Republican voters.

The Supreme Court term starts on Monday with an important environmental law case that concerns a lawsuit filed by Boulder, Colorado, seeking damages against the fossil fuel industry for climate change. The energy companies will be down a man, because their boy, Justice Samuel Alito, has recused himself from the case (his........

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