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Half of new parents have unwanted, intrusive thoughts of harming their infants. Research suggests most aren’t dangerous.

11 0
23.09.2026

Imagine you are standing near the railing of a seventh-floor balcony with your infant in your arms when a sudden thought crosses your mind: you could drop your baby over the edge. How does that make you feel? What are you likely to do?

Now imagine you see your baby lying on his play mat on the floor, and you have a sudden image of stepping on them on purpose. Are you worried you are unwell? A bad parent or, worse, a dangerous one? This is the experience of many new parents.

Our research with colleagues has found that 99 per cent of new birthing parents (mothers and birthing parents of other genders) have some unwanted, intrusive thoughts of accidental harm coming to their newborn infant. Approximately 50 per cent experience some unwanted, intrusive thoughts of harming their infant on purpose.

Unwanted, intrusive thoughts are those that pop into a person’s mind unexpectedly. They are a common human experience. Almost everyone (about 95 per cent) has occasional unwanted, intrusive thoughts that they find morally repugnant because the content of the thoughts goes against their wishes, values and beliefs.

These kinds of thoughts are more common when we’re stressed, and they typically reflect what preoccupies us, what we’re afraid of and what we most want to avoid.

Does this sound like new parents? They are stressed, preoccupied with their baby and strongly motivated to keep their infant safe.

Thinking about harm is not doing it

The thing most people worry about is whether unwanted, intrusive thoughts of infant-related harm signal a........

© The Conversation