It happens just when you need to leave. Bags are packed. Shoes are on. Then your child decides a jumper is impossible.

You say, “put your jumper on”.

They say, “I’m not cold”.

Do kids really not feel the cold like adults do? Or are they just expressing their independence? And when should you insist?

A clue from pain research

I study how children experience pain, and pain research offers one clue about this jumper battle.

A child may scrape their knee during a game and barely notice until the game stops. The scrape was there throughout, but chasing a friend or reaching the next base kept winning their attention.

Cold can slip into the background in a similar way. A child’s fingers may be cooling while the playground remains far more compelling. Then the game ends.

Their attention returns to their hands at around the same time their moving muscles stop producing so much heat. Suddenly, the jumper may seem like a better idea.

So “I’m not cold” can mean, “I can feel it and I’m comfortable”.

It can also mean, “the jumper feels worse” or “I want to keep playing”. Sometimes it means, “I am four years old and this has become a matter of principle”.

Similarly, when parents ask, “but aren’t you cold?” we’re often asking several questions at once.

Will you still be warm when you stop running? What if the wind picks up? How about later, when we’re standing still on the sideline at the soccer field?

Children report the present........

© The Conversation