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Therapy has limits. It can help you gain skills and new perspectives, but it can't control your motivation.

Having clear, achievable goals from the start helps you get the most out of the process.

Don't be afraid to ask questions or shop around to ensure a good fit.

Over my 50 years of practice, I’ve learned that therapy, like most professions, has both limits and strengths. Here’s my top-five list of what therapy cannot do.

You’ve probably known people who could benefit from therapy to help them resolve problems, gain a different perspective, learn skills, and make sense of their pasts. But they don’t try it because it seems too overwhelming, or they don’t know how to find someone skilled enough, or they’re afraid they’ll be stuck in it forever. And then there are those who come in once or twice because they are sent by the court, their attorney, their partner, or their boss. They come to comply, to get these others off their back, but basically they believe they don’t need therapy.

A good therapist can make starting and attending sessions as comfortable as possible for the anxious; they can inspire hope, but they can’t get them through the front door. And for those who don’t want to be there, there's little to do—the therapist is providing a service; they’re not........

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