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Therapists Are Not Okay Either

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05.03.2026

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The emotional and relational impact of clinical work inevitably affects therapists.

Professional cultural norms can make it difficult for therapists to openly discuss this psychological impact.

Therapy can provide therapists with a rare space to reflect, decompress, and explore their own inner lives.

Many therapists know the experience of leaving work while still carrying pieces of other people’s lives. Session after session, we sit with grief, trauma, uncertainty, anger, longing, confusion, messy family dynamics, sophisticated relational projections, and stories that can penetrate you to your core.

In response, we listen deeply, track patterns across years of someone’s life, unpack mind-boggling events, and implement advanced psycho-somatic interventions that may indefinitely alter a person’s future. It is a nonstop parade of companionship, co-regulation, encouragement, complex interpretation, witnessing, and transformative guidance.

For many, it is meaningful yet highly demanding work. Nonetheless, there is a quiet irony in the profession: therapists often have very few places where they themselves can think out loud, be an emotional trainwreck, or simply engage with the questions haunting their life.

A Shadow Within Professional Therapy Spaces

There is a subtle, often unconscious culture within many professional therapy circles that can make vulnerability difficult. Therapists are trained to be thoughtful, regulated, and competent in the room, which is essential for good clinical care. Yet over time, this expectation can quietly harden into something else: the sense that we must always have ourselves together… at all times.

In some professional spaces, uncertainty, confusion, or emotional impact can feel relationally risky to admit. The result is that many therapists become highly skilled at caring for others while privately carrying far more than they share.

In certain clinical environments, observers may even notice moments when therapists themselves drift into subtle competitiveness, engage in petty forms of cultural warfare, or project quiet judgment among colleagues.

This creates an odd professional paradox: a room full of people trained in emotional honesty who are sometimes hesitant to admit when they themselves feel confused, overwhelmed, or simply human. Therapists are trained to normalize the full range of human emotion, yet our professional culture can sometimes make it surprisingly difficult for therapists to acknowledge when they themselves are struggling. This is particularly salient within counselling psychology training programs, institutional environments, and regulatory spaces that emphasize unwavering competence in every interaction.

Therapy for Therapists

Over the years in my own private clinical practice, I have had the privilege of working with therapists at many stages of their careers: undergraduate or graduate students, early-career clinicians, and seasoned practitioners navigating the long arc of professional life.

Some arrive in therapy because something in their personal life has become genuinely difficult or painful. Others arrive not because something has fallen apart, but because they realize they would like a space where the complexity of their own inner life can be explored with the same care they offer others. For many therapists, this becomes a rare kind of personal and professional refuge.

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Therapy is a place where they do not need to appear endlessly composed or insightful, and it provides a space where the emotional impact of clinical work can be named honestly and fully. Sometimes, therapists explore their wild experiences of countertransference without fear of judgement, and have challenging discussions around how their personal histories inevitably shape how they sit with others.

Others wish to begin learning how to live the deeper existential questions that frequently emerge after witnessing human suffering after a myriad of years. Subsequently, other therapists arrive at therapy carrying depression, burnout, psycho-somatic exhaustion, fatigue, vicarious trauma, immense stress, and tremendous political grief regarding painful events of the world.

And sometimes therapists simply want a place where they themselves can think out loud or transform into a messy pile of tears, just like everyone else. Paradoxically, therapy can reconnect clinicians with what drew them to the profession in the first place: curiosity about the human mind, reverence for emotional life, a desire to engage in mystery, and the belief that understanding ourselves more deeply changes how we live.

For therapists who spend their days holding the emotional worlds of others, having a place where they too can be held is not a luxury. It is often part of sustaining the work itself.

Over time, psychotherapeutic and clinical work inevitably leaves its own imprint on us. This does not mean therapists are failing at their job; if anything, it often means the work is being embodied, felt, and authentically engaged with.

Many therapists spend their days helping others think out loud about the complexities of their inner lives. We deserve a space where we can do the same. After all, therapists may hold many stories, but we are still human beings living one of our own.


© Psychology Today