Cultivating Confidence

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Economic uncertainty shapes parenting choices—often without anyone in the family naming it directly.

Asking the question you'd normally answer yourself is one of the most effective ways to build autonomy.

Confidence built through real experience holds differently than confidence built through praise alone.

My daughter Carys runs a small pet-sitting business. One of her clients has a house that's been under renovation for longer than anyone in the neighborhood can remember. Out back there's a shed. That's where the cat lives. The owner was going to visit their daughter for a few days and didn't have anyone else to ask.

Carys said yes and charged less than her usual rate. She told me she figured the owner probably didn't have anyone else who'd take the job for what they could pay.

The pressure to set children up for financial security has never felt more urgent. Trade school enrollment at public two-year schools grew almost 20 percent between 2020 and 2025. A four-year private college degree now runs close to two hundred thousand dollars, roughly double what it cost three decades ago. In one recent survey, 71 percent of Gen Z respondents said vocational school carries more stigma than college, while only 7 percent of their parents said they'd prefer their kid go the trade route.

Kids are more open to different paths than their parents are. And when economic uncertainty moves into a house, parents tend to respond in one of two ways.

One instinct watches for whether a child will be able to stand on their own two feet: steady income, safety, a way to pay rent without help. The other instinct watches for who........

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