The Science of Mating

Take our Are You a Good First Date?

Find a therapist near me

According to the "Box Theory," a person will mentally put their date into one of three permanent categories.

The categories referred to by "Box Theory" are relationship material, casual sex material, or immaterial.

Not everyone uses "Box Theory," and feelings can grow over time—so it's best to remain optimistic.

You may have seen this so-called "Box Theory" being mentioned on social media. The theory is that men on a first date with a woman will quickly put the woman into one of three mutually exclusive boxes—relationship material, casual sex material, or essentially immaterial. And that this box supposedly isn't a moving box—meaning that the woman can't do much to move from that box into another.

Is it really this simple then? Do all men do this? Or is the "Box Theory" itself unfairly throwing all men into one, umm, box? Well, on social media channels like Reddit, this theory has certainly caused quite a flap. So, let's unpack this "Box Theory."

What Is This 'Box Theory of Dating'?

A TikToker who goes by the nickname Tinx has asserted in a video post that's gotten over 261K likes that she developed the "Box Theory" to counter the traditional advice that a woman should wait at least three to five dates to sleep with a man so that he is more likely to consider her relationship material. The TikToker argued that the guy will have already boxed the woman sometime early in the first date. “It’s very difficult to shift from box to box, and your behavior doesn’t really affect what box you’re in," says Tinx. "So, if he meets you and he’s like, ‘I wanna date this........

© Psychology Today