How 'Cushioning' Can Be a Problem in Dating
The Science of Mating
Take our Are You a Good First Date?
Find a therapist near me
"Cushioning" is maintaining backup people to date in case the current relationship does not work out.
Cushioning is essentially micro-cheating or even actual cheating, such as staying in close contact with exes.
People cushion out of insecurity, the fear of being single, or the desire to date other people.
When you suspect cushioning, be frank and open with your partner about your concerns and check the response.
If the person you are dating offers you seat cushions whenever you sit down, your reaction might be "sofa" so good. However, it can be a very different story if he or she is "cushioning" himself or herself. That's because "cushioning" on social media and the Internet has come to mean the practice of maintaining backups when dating someone—backup people to date in case the current relationship does not work out for whatever reason.
What Is 'Cushioning'?
The term “cushioning" comes from the phrase "cushion your fall." Now, it may be natural to continue to date multiple people before you've gone exclusive with someone. However, once you're my-one-and-only with each other, the expectation usually is that neither of you will continue to keep others around as dating possibilities. Not everyone follows that dating convention, though.
Your significant other, for example, may continue to flirt with other people. This includes any behavior signaling to others that he or she is still available as a dating option. In fact, your significant other may not even tell others that you are his or her significant other.........
