Regret can be an opportunity to practice greater compassion and presence rather than an indication of failure.

Misunderstood regret can show up as shame, which can fuel depression, anger, and emotional distancing in men.

Many fathers struggle to admit their mistakes, making it difficult for them to reap the benefits of regret.

In my recent posts, we have been discussing the psychological value of fathers encountering and experiencing regret as a way of breaking old and unhelpful parenting patterns and laying the groundwork for new and more constructive ones, particularly as their children leave home and establish lives as independent adults.

One thing that I have noticed in my years as a family psychologist is that it is not at all uncommon for me to hear mothers (often ruefully) ask themselves if they have been good enough parents to their children. But it is far less common for me to hear fathers ask themselves the same question.

Differences in Processing Regret Between Men and Women

There are many ways to explain this discrepancy, but, in general, my sense is that men have greater difficulty acknowledging and expressing regret than women do.

Much of this has to do with how males are........

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