The Epstein papers have dropped, and, of course, as anyone with the brain power exceeding that of your common garden snail could’ve told you, it turned out to be more disappointing than a Bulwark staffer’s wife’s wedding night. If you were looking for a giant Trump conspiracy, all you got was Bill Clinton floating in a tub with some bimbo. And if that surprises you, I can only assume that someone accompanies you everywhere you go, reminding you to breathe.

Out at AmFest, the Turning Point USA convention, one of the big topics was the USS Liberty incident from 1967. That’s another IQ test that takes the form of a conspiracy theory. It’s a perennial favorite among dumb people who blame Jews for everything, from war to pestilence to their own inability to perform sexually with another person in the room. And, of course, we’ve also recently seen the relitigation of 9/11 – my friends who were literally in the Pentagon when it was hit by the airliner are always thrilled to be told they don’t know what they’re talking about by some Internet rando who’s never known the loving touch of another human being who took a deep dive into Reddit subforums and understands that it was really a scheme pulled off by a combination of the Trilateral Commission, the Rand Corporation, the saucer people, and, of course, the Jews.

We’re through the looking glass here, people.

At least no one is currently talking about JFK, other than by demeaning Trump by adding his name to that of the failed president, but highly successful pervert, on the Trump-Kennedy Center. I’m old, and I’ve had to deal with people all my life coming up with complex and intricate theories as to how JFK got shot that all ignore Occam’s Razor – a communist jerk who knew how to shoot shot him, and a bunch of leftists hated the fact that a leftist shot him, so they decided to blame everybody else but leftists. Many are just bored with their lives, while others are delusional, imagining they were the special ones capable of peeling the onion of a giant plot that no one else had the insight to detect.

As I said, conspiracy theories are IQ tests, and far too many people are failing.

But we ought to define our terms. A "conspiracy theory" is a conjecture about a plot in which a large group of people work together to achieve an invidious result while also blaming someone else to support their narrative. A conspiracy theory is not a conspiracy theory if it’s a result of idiocy. That’s an idiocy theory. And we shouldn’t underestimate the power of stupidity because it’s essentially the cold fusion of human endeavor powering almost everything bad that’s going on through........

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