I never let anyone buy me clothes.

This is because I am extremely specific about what I wear, and because at some point I went down the facial-analysis rabbit hole and discovered that I am an Ethereal Romantic with a slight Natural/ Gamine twist.

This means I wear very specific things that complement my facial harmony.

I realize I have already lost approximately half of you reading this.

Despite this, an incredible woman I know from the Philippines, who works here as a caregiver, gave me what has become my absolute favorite dress for my birthday.

And somehow she NAILED IT.

It is exactly the right shade of plum for a True Spring. There’s a subtle brocade texture that works beautifully with the Romantic part of my features, and a whimsical keyhole neckline that complements the elongated Ethereal structure of my face.

I have now lost another 20 percent of you.

Whatever. The remaining 30 percent of you are my people.

Last night, a friend and I were scheduled to have literally the most whimsical evening imaginable at the American Colony Hotel.

We’re talking fairy lights. Hendrick’s gin. Beautiful food. And the kind of service you rarely encounter in Jerusalem, where no one acts personally betrayed when you ask for another glass of water.

Now, you may not know this about me, but while I am fundamentally a hippie with a strong streak of Maria von Trapp, I also enjoy occasionally leaning into an alter ego I call Baroness von Schrader.

Baroness von Schrader does not carry a tote bag filled with half-eaten Bamba, wet wipes, and a single........

© The Times of Israel (Blogs)