As far as fall traditions go, the renaissance faire is among Cockburn’s favorite. Fair maidens and humble peasants amble around stalls, chewing on turkey legs and spectating jousts as they pretend to be in Auld Europe. Yet in recent years, modern degeneracy has taken hold: now instead of a family day out, renfaire is fun for the whole polycule. Pornified bartenders in Euphoria makeup humiliate horny patrons as they serve them drinks.

The Maryland Renaissance Festival is taking steps to stop the rot. The faire is implementing a new dress code that bans “fursuits.” For the blissfully uninitiated: fursuits are full-body costumes worn by the “furry” subculture, which mean the wearer appears to be an anime-style anthropomorphic animal. Members of the furry community insist it is not a sex thing. Cockburn remains skeptical.

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The festival’s general manager told City Cast DC that the change came following customer complaints, with some attendees “feeling uncomfortable by those wearing fursuits,” he wrote.

As a keen student of European history, Cockburn was curious: weren’t the Middle Ages “uncomfortable” times? Surely there must be some precedent for this brand of freakery. He consulted Charles Yost, associate professor of medieval history at Hillsdale College, for greater insight.

“Medieval peasants were not known for their love of diverse lifestyles,” Yost........

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