Rejoice, cinema lovers. Tilly Norwood is back! Not familiar? I don’t blame you, as she’s not exactly a household name yet – though a fleet of well-fed publicists is certainly trying to rectify that. Tilly Norwood is an “AI actor”, as in, an actor that’s not actually an actor at all. Just a series of digital blobs and lines of code designed to resemble a young woman in the lucrative 18-to-49-year-old target demographic. Thus far, Tilly has lived exclusively in easily digestible social media clips and hyperbolic press releases about the “future of entertainment”. But now, “she” (I feel like a complete buffoon for assigning a gender to a computer program) is finally ready for the world of feature films. The company Particle6, which spat out this risible creation, announced that it has commenced development on a motion picture starring this very elaborate and expensive cartoon avatar.

The film, titled Misaligned, will see Tilly seduced by a rogue program into experimenting with human emotions – “desires, impulses, and ambition”, as described by Variety. The company claims that the film will be a “coming-of-age story infused with existential AI chaos”. I can’t help but wonder what resonance a “coming-of-age story” can have if the protagonist is a computer program that doesn’t understand the concept of time, ageing or mortality. Does Tilly Norwood understand the concept of a 24-hour day? Does “she” know the glorious warmth of a mid-afternoon sun? Has “she” ever forgotten to move her car because it’s street cleaning day on her block? Tilly Norwood, being an animated sprite, is neither “coming” nor “of........

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