This story is part of “Parenting: What Google Won’t Tell You” — The Better India’s people-led parenting series that goes beyond conventional advice to document how real families are actually raising their children. Through real parents, parenting coaches, influencers and experts, the series brings honest, diverse and relatable perspectives on the questions, choices, challenges and solutions that shape everyday parenting — the things Google can’t always answer.

By the time Merlyn D’souza walks through the door after work, the day has already been a long one. But in Mumbai, homecoming comes with its own little reward: her two children running towards her for a hug.

For Merlyn, Associate Director, Public Relations at EL SOL Strategic Consultants and a mother to a six-year-old daughter and one-year-old son, this is the part of the day she looks forward to the most.

It is also a reminder of something she has learnt since becoming a mother: being a present parent does not mean being available every minute of the day. Sometimes, it simply means being completely there when you are.

Letting go of the perfect-mother checklist

Merlyn became a mother in 2020, when the world outside felt uncertain and overwhelming. Having a newborn during the pandemic made her realise how quickly life could narrow down to what truly mattered.

Instead of trying to fit herself into an idea of what a “perfect” mother or professional should look like, she began creating her own definition of motherhood.

Her first pregnancy........

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