Find a therapist to help with ADHD

Many adults with ADHD carry lasting emotional wounds from school that often carry over into parenting.

Repeated negative feedback during formative school years can shape self-concept in adulthood.

Early school experiences often influence how adults with ADHD respond to their child's learning.

Understanding past school experiences can help adults with ADHD respond more intentionally to their children.

“Tell me about a place you would never want to go back to—not a destination, a setting."

It’s a question I sometimes use in therapy because it gives people something concrete to hold onto. Broad questions about childhood can be hard to answer. But this one tends to unlock something specific, and for many adults with ADHD, the answer comes quickly: School.

Often not just “school” in general, but a particular classroom, teacher, or stretch of years that felt confusing, discouraging, or humiliating.

The Messages That Linger

When adults with ADHD reflect on their time in school, the details differ, but the themes are remarkably consistent. They remember being described as:

capable, but inconsistent

bright, but not applying themselves

disruptive, distracted, or careless

Or the dreaded P word: not reaching their potential.

These descriptions were written in report cards, spoken in meetings, or implied through daily interactions.........

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