The Science of Mating

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Gamification in online dating apps tends to interfere with building connections more so than finding them.

Desires for both quantity and quality are primary competing goals in online dating.

Secure attachment can help protect against gamification on dating apps.

Have you ever felt as though you were a player in someone else’s game? When game design features are incorporated into an experience that is not normally a game, such as forming an intimate relationship, we call this “gamification.”

In many circumstances, gamification can enhance our interest and enjoyment in everyday life. For instance, say you’ve made a game out of a long car ride to pass the time, or you’ve paired an otherwise mundane task with a reward or a challenge. These strategies are generally supported when they help us engage more meaningfully with ourselves, others, and the world. With online dating, however, the use of gamification is considerably more difficult to endorse.

While online dating apps openly use gamification features to engage their users, recent research has linked these features with dating fatigue, self-esteem concerns, overstimulation, carelessness, obsessive-compulsive behaviours, and a sense of dejection. Though it might feel tempting to write off dating apps altogether, let’s take pause and consider the nuances:

What seems to matter most is how an intimate relationship is nurtured after matching, rather than how you matched.........

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