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Parents may be accused of neglect or abuse when a child cuts them off, but that's often a one-sided narrative.

Alienated parents and therapists are claiming social media space to argue parents are not always to blame.

One therapist suggests that parents not "chase" children or make them the center of their emotional universe.

When adult children go no contact, parents feel misunderstood or manipulated, and often have no opportunity to share their side of the story. They are rendered voiceless.

The societal perspective frequently assumes that if a child has cut off from a mother or father, the parent must be at fault: guilty of abuse, neglect or other failings. This skewed view is widespread because social media tends to be the territory of young people, who are generally more adept than their elders at using those platforms to make themselves heard.

But the experience is much more complicated. Estrangement can arise from many factors, including manipulation by third parties, unresolved trauma, and even simple misunderstandings.

Parental alienation is emotionally fraught, as parents feel guilt, shame, and helplessness at having seemingly failed in this crucial, primary relationship. Making matters worse, alienated parents are marginalized and powerless, and stigma and shame shroud their experience. Their ostracism and isolation is compounded by a lack of understanding from friends, family, and society at large.

In recent years, however, some parents whose adult children have cut them off—as well as therapists who recognize the unfairness of the “parents are always at fault” narrative—are pushing back. Turning to social media platforms, they are sharing stories, connecting with others who........

© Psychology Today