What Is Positive Psychology?

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Birthdays are powerful psychological landmarks that shape identity, motivation, and perception over time.

Grief can strip birthdays of meaning, but positive psychology can help us reclaim it.

Savoring and gratitude transform birthdays from painful reminders into celebrations of life.

I recently celebrated my 51st birthday with very little fanfare, and that is generally just how I like it. Ever since my mother passed away 23 years ago and my grandmother 9 years after that, birthdays have never been the same. Growing up, I could not wait for my birthday. I was always so excited to be a year older, to hit that next milestone, and after the novelty became the new normal a few days later, I was already looking toward the next one. I never stopped to be where my feet were, to enjoy the current status, or simply appreciate where I was in life. I was always rushing toward the next best stage. Life was always a pursuit and never an appreciation. Maybe because I never felt that my birthday was my own.

My mom was always quick to remind me that this landmark day on the yearly calendar—the one that read "David's Birthday"—was in fact her day. The day she gave birth to me. The day she brought new life into this world. The day she was gifted with a son. I belonged to her. My life and everything about it belonged to her. I don't begrudge her for feeling this way; she was not wrong. But she was not entirely right either. So, while I was celebrating the opportunities for the year ahead, she was celebrating the anniversary of a moment and the life she had provided me to date. My birthday was her day.

Aging into adulthood—graduating college, becoming a police officer, falling in love—was possibly one of the greatest challenges for both of........

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