You’ve got to feel sorry for these people really, the poor dears. First, they had to pack away all their Father Ted DVDs, never again to hear the words “I hear you’re a racist now, Father”. Then they had to put away their Harry Potter movies and Dumbledore wands and Hogwarts Lego, never again to hear the word “expelliarmus”. And now – oh, deepest cut – they must remove/hide/destroy every CD or LP or download they have ever had of The Proclaimers and solemnly vow to never again, on a night-out when they’ve had a few, sing with drunken joy, arms around the shoulders of their friends, the words “I would walk 500 miles and I would walk 500 more.” Because it would be wrong.

Or at least, it would be wrong now, by which I mean it was not wrong last week but it is wrong this week because this week we discovered that The Proclaimers have similar views to Graham Linehan who wrote Father Ted and JK Rowling who wrote Harry Potter. This makes things very hard for the sort of people who disapprove of Graham Linehan and JK Rowling because whereas they can all agree that Linehan and Rowling are awful and ghastly and wrong, the Proclaimers were one of us! They sang songs about the evils of Thatcherism! “Bathgate no more/Linwood no more/Methil no more”. Must we now sing “Proclaimers no more”?

So what exactly have The Proclaimers done that is so bad, what have they said to incur the wrath of the righteous and bring down the curse of the cancellers? What they have said is that they don’t support the concept of trans self-identification that underpinned the SNP’s 2022 gender bill – so much so that the brothers, Craig and Charlie, who’ve been supporters of the SNP for decades, couldn’t bring themselves to vote for the party at the last election. “I am 100 per cent supportive of Scottish independence,” said Craig. “I am not 100 per cent supportive........

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