In the new BBC cosy crime drama Death Valley, there was a scene with a nosy neighbour twitching their net curtains. You don’t see much of that today, largely due to nets going out of fashion, but mostly because it is so much easier to snoop online.

For example, from a rainy Bank Holiday in Glasgow I could take a tour of a 5-bed, 4-bathroom property in Sandbanks, Dorset, complete with its own wine room and within a flip-flop’s throw of the beach. On the market for £15 million. A bargain, particularly when you consider the neighbourhood. According to another website, Sandbanks is home to Graeme Souness, Harry Redknapp, and JRR Tolkien, though I’m pretty sure you won’t see the latter popping out for a pint of milk.

Sandbank has once again been named Britain’s most expensive seaside location in a Bank of Scotland/Lloyds survey published this week. The average home in the area will set you back £965,708, but prices are down 3% on last year. Other choice coastal locations were Salcombe in Devon, Padstow, Cornwall, and Aldeburgh, Suffolk.

Sandbanks is described as a 'millionaires' playground' (Image: free)

If there is a top of the league there must be a bottom, which is where Scotland comes in. The ten cheapest places to buy a home near the coast are in this country, with Campbeltown in last spot with an average price of just £103,078 - down 11% in a year. Campbeltown is followed by Rothesay, Millport and Port Bannatyne.

While the survey authors took a glass-half-full approach, pointing out that the coastal market in general was doing well, it was hard not to feel saddened by Campbeltown’s position,........

© Herald Scotland