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You’re Not Heartbroken, You’re Traumatized (and 3 Steps to Heal)

Often, we confuse the act of getting over someone with the ability to heal from all the trauma they caused us.

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If you’ve ever been through a traumatic breakup, you know just how long it can take to heal from the mistreatment, betrayal, and loss. Just because you no longer miss your ex or want them back doesn’t mean you’re over what they did to you. 

“After a breakup, many people might ‘move on’ from their ex but not from what the relationship taught them about trust, closeness, and self-worth,” says Doriel Jacov, JD, LCSW, an individual and couples psychotherapist and former corporate attorney specializing in trauma, attachment, and relationship dynamics. “There are emotional consequences to being ghosted, manipulated, criticized, or emotionally abandoned. Relationships shape our unconscious expectations of intimacy.”

Often, we confuse the act of getting over someone with the ability to heal from all the trauma they caused us. However, the latter can take years.

Think about it: childhood........

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