Parenting experts say that sometimes the signs that we’re raising good kids don’t look how we might expect them.

Here are some counterintuitive, seemingly negative behaviors we sometimes see in kids that are actually bright green flags that Mom and Dad are doing a bang-up job.

1. You get the worst of them

It’s frustrating to get great reports from school about your kid’s behavior, only for them to fall apart, rebel, and act out the second they walk through the door.

But it doesn’t mean the teachers are doing a better job at raising your kids than you are. On the contrary:

“When they are out there in the world at school, playing sports, with friends or extended family they see the best version. Oh, so not fair. But it is true we get the unpolished, tired and cranky version. That is a compliment,” says Dr. Jennifer Politis, therapist and founder of Wellness Counseling. “It means home aka YOU is the one place they trust enough to stop performing. Kids who never fall apart at home often don’t feel safe enough anywhere to be their unfiltered selves.”

2. They push back on your rules

You might think that kids raised properly will follow rules, be obedient, and have immense respect for their parents’ instructions.

The experts say not so.

“A teen who argues ‘why do I have a curfew at 11’ while they still walk in the door at 10:59pm and on time is practicing healthy norms of testing boundaries,” says Politis. “Seeing how far they can push things verbally instead of acting them out. The negotiation is how they build their own internal dialogue instead of just........

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