The October 7, 2023, Hamas massacre in the south of Israel caught 37-year-old filmmaker Abraham “Abie” Troen in the final stages of working on a music documentary, “Just Sing.”

That day, his sister Deborah Shahar and his brother-in-law Shlomi Matias were murdered in Kibbutz Holit. Their 16-year-old son lay beneath his mother with a gunshot wound in his abdomen, and was rescued from the house 10 hours later.

At the time, Troen was working on completing of his co-directed film, which has since premiered at the 2025 Tribeca Film Festival and will be released in theaters in the United States in the coming days.

Only now has the Los Angeles-based filmmaker begun dealing with the consequences of his loss.

“Every second I wasn’t working on the project, I had to be an uncle and a son, which to me was the more meaningful obligation. The role of ‘bereaved brother’ was pushed to the bottom of the list,” Troen tells The Times of Israel. “In the year that followed, I began documenting my family — a project I am deeply immersed in that expresses a tension between despair and hope.”

In a scene from the documentary Troen is currently working on, “An Israeli with an Accent,” his 83-year-old father, Ilan, an emeritus professor of history, is seen lecturing students at the University of California, Berkeley. “All of us,” says the elder Troen, “tend to view that territory between the river and the sea through a cultural filter. It’s not ‘neutral territory.’ It hasn’t been so for millennia. It has to do with what we imagine that place to be and imagine what that place ought to be.”

Like his father, Troen wants to take an active part in imagining a different future for Israel — one of coexistence for its two peoples.

“I draw a lot of inspiration from my family, from my brother-in-law, and especially from my niece and nephews, who have had to cope with a world without parents and without a home for three years already, and with my nephew’s horrific trauma after he hid beneath my sister,” he says. After surviving the murder of his parents, his nephew has lived with another uncle, Prof. Aron Troen, who likewise speaks publicly about a day in which the Palestinian and Israeli peoples can live side by side.

“The things you read about in the news are what I come back to again and again, and I want to make sure my niece and nephews will be okay,” says Abie Troen, who spoke with The Times of Israel last Thursday, a few hours before his parents hosted a salon memorial evening at their home in Omer, a small city in southern Israel, in commemoration of their daughter and her husband. The grassroots Israeli tradition of Zikaron BaSalon, originally set up for Holocaust Remembrance Day, now brings small groups of people together in private homes to share testimonies and mourn on all national memorial days.

‘I draw a lot of inspiration from my family, and especially from my nephews, who have had to cope with a world without parents and without a home for three years’

‘I draw a lot of inspiration from my family, and especially from my nephews, who have had to cope with a world without parents and without a home for three years’

On Monday night, the filmmaker took part in a joint memorial ceremony held by the Parents Circle-Families Forum (PCFF) and the Combatants for Peace movement for the 21st time.

This alternative Memorial Day event is a recurring national flashpoint, frequently drawing intense protests from right-wing activists who view mourning Palestinians alongside Israeli victims as an unforgivable betrayal.

This year’s ceremony took place in an undisclosed location in Jaffa and was broadcast live in Tel Aviv and in Jericho, where Palestinian participants gathered, as well as in screenings across the globe.

Among the Israeli family members who attended was Ayala Metzger, the daughter-in-law of Yoram Metzger, who was kidnapped from Kibbutz Nir Oz on October 7, 2023, and was later murdered in Hamas captivity in Gaza.

“Out of this devastation, I made a decision: So that his death would not be in vain, I will fight to create a reality here that allows safe lives for everyone,” Metzger said on stage. “I chose to join the PCFF out of a desire that no one should experience the pain we went through, and with the understanding that partnership is the answer to the violent discourse and hatred around us.”

“I imagine that on this land, from the Mediterranean Sea to the Jordan River, boys and girls from both nations will grow up healthy, happy, free, and safe, respecting every human being for who they are,” she continued. “This is not a distant fantasy but an achievable goal, and each of us has the power to attain it.”

In a pre-recorded video, Kholoud Hushiah of Jenin spoke about the loss of her son, Mohammed, who was killed by IDF fire in 2023, which prompted her to join the Parents’ Circle.

“Despite all this pain, I stand here today to say: We chose the path of peace, despite all the losses, because we believe that blood only begets more blood, and that death and bereavement will never allow us, or our children, to live in peace,” said Hushiah.

Nahil Jamil Hanouna, a photographer from Gaza who lost........

© The Times of Israel