This week we see the ending of one of the most powerful relationships in the Torah – that of Miriam, Aharon and Moshe. A counterweight to stories of sibling rivalry it offers a unique perspective on the power of siblings working together and a role model for us.

Sibling Rivalry in the Torah

When we think of siblings in the Torah, conflict often comes to mind. From the outset of Bereishit, we see strained sibling relationships:

The Torah does not shy away from the complexity of sibling dynamics. Yet, it also offers a powerful counter-narrative—a vision of siblinghood at its best. In this week’s parsha, Chukat, we find a compelling example: the relationship between Moshe, Aharon, and Miriam, a sibling bond that shaped the destiny of the Jewish people.

The Unique Nature of Sibling Relationships

Sibling relationships are unique. They are not chosen, yet they often shape us most profoundly, typically being our first and longest-lasting bonds, from early childhood to old age. Siblings are our first mirrors, reflecting our strengths and weaknesses, challenging our identity, and teaching us about fairness, loyalty, and love. Psychological research confirms that sibling bonds play a critical role in emotional development, empathy, and social skills.

Birth order also influences how we relate to the world (though this is a simplification):

Yet, as life progresses, sibling relationships can be overshadowed by friendships, careers, or marriages, strained by distance or diverging paths. Their potential for depth and resilience, however, remains unmatched.

A Modern Blind Spot

In contemporary life, the sibling bond is often underappreciated. At funerals I’ve attended, the focus is understandably on children and grandchildren. But the sibling—who may have known the deceased longer than anyone else—often stands quietly to the side, feeling lonely in their grief. This is a poignant loss. Siblings share our earliest memories, witness our growth, and walk with us through life’s major chapters. Their love is enduring, their presence deserving of recognition.

This Week’s Parsha: A Model of Sibling Unity

Parshat Chukat (

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