There are plenty of reasons to be depressed about Britain right now. From our government, which consists mainly of sixth-formers with special needs, to our sporting teams, which conspire to lose across the world. And polls show this depression is real: in a poll on ‘national happiness’ in different countries Britain has plunged from 13th place to 29th, in only a few years. 

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But if I was asked to name one small but daily aspect of modern British life that gets me down the most, I would answer: litter. All the bloody litter, everywhere. My despair gets so bad that sometimes I convince myself I’m imagining it; did London always look like this? But then I check old photos, and I realise I’m right. Sure, the past wasn’t perfect; they had smog, slavery, really bad coffee and rickets, but somehow, they also managed to keep the pavements relatively impeccable. Yet we cannot. 

Why this has happened is a subject for another, more dismal article, because I am here, like the angel of the future, to bring good news to modern Brits. The End of Litter is Nigh. Why so? One word: robotics. In the swirl of wild events, from war to AI, many people have missed the huge advances........

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