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A Guide To Watching The World Cup For Those Too Lazy To Do Anything Else 

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As World Cup soccer inundates the airwaves, it occurs to me that many Americans have little knowledge of it, frustrating their enjoyment of the beloved sport. Soccer-watching experts like myself can fix that sad state of affairs. Allow me to share a few pointers, so that even Americans can learn to relish soccer games.

Hit Snooze: Remember that while 6 of the 8 billion people on Earth will watch World Cup soccer, about 5.9 billion of those folks will merely be channel-surfing, come across a game, and then instantly fall asleep. So this guide is designed for the remaining few die-hards who’ll stay awake well into the first two to three minutes.

No Breaks: Soccer fans are quite proud that soccer games are a full 90 minutes,........

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