The world is breathing a little easier this morning after stunning developments in Washington overnight.

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At a secret meeting of the cabinet, it was agreed that the 25th amendment of the US constitution would be invoked, removing Donald Trump as president and replacing him with vice president JD Vance.

Section 4 of the amendment allows for the forcible removal of a sitting president who is deemed incapable of performing their duties.

"This was not an easy decision," JD Vance said in a statement after the cabinet meeting. "Just as families must decide when elderly and frail parents can no longer look after themselves, when it is no longer safe for them to drive, as cabinet secretaries after much deliberation, and in light of his recent bouts of incoherence and the resulting global economic crisis, we came to the conclusion that Mr Trump is unfit for office."

Mr Trump was informed of the decision after attending a dinner at the American Geography Society at which he unveiled plans to rename the Strait of Hormuz the Strait of Trump.

He was then bundled into the presidential limousine and taken to the Walter Reed National Military Medical Centre, where he was sedated before being flown to an aged care facility in Florida. Several sources say the facility has built an exact replica of the Oval Office to ease the former president's transition to private care.

In other news, the Australian government has announced tough new restrictions on plastic packaging. From July 1, it will no longer be legal to sell household products in adult-proof packaging. Assistant Minister for Almost Everything including Consumer Affairs Andrew Leigh told reporters the decision came after years of complaints from frustrated consumers.

"Ordinary Australians will no longer take home new scissors only to find they need scissors to get them out of the packaging," he said. Dr Leigh also flagged new consumer regulations making it mandatory for shampoo and conditioner containers to be labelled clearly with a minimum font size that didn't require reading glasses to tell the difference between the soapy and oily stuff.

Speculation of a leadership challenge to the Liberal leader is mounting after Andrew Hastie pledged his full support for Angus Taylor. Mr Hastie's comments came after he said he was open to talking about changes to the capital gains tax discount and negative gearing. This was at odds with Mr Taylor, who is fiercely opposed to any loose talk about making the housing market fairer for young people.

In a rare display of social responsibility, big tech companies have announced sweeping changes to their algorithms as well as employing foolproof age restrictions to keep kids off their platforms.

"We've learned the lesson from big pharma," said an industry insider. "If you sell an addictive and harmful product, people will eventually find out and your share value and reputation will plummet. We want Twitface and Instatok to get back to basics. Photos of people's lunches and nephews and no more fake news."

Happy April 1, pinch and a punch. I'll show myself out...

HAVE YOUR SAY: What's the most memorable April fool's joke you've fallen for? Given Trump's conflicting statements and irrational actions over the Middle East war, should the 25th amendment be invoked? Email us: echidna@theechidna.com.au

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IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:

- Customers will no longer be hit with sneaky fees when they pay with debit and credit cards - but how much they ultimately save is out of their hands.

- The Coalition will oppose a move to increase the number of MPs in federal parliament, saying it will cost taxpayers too much.

- The Fair Work Commission's decision to scrap discounted pay rates for young-adult workers in retail and fast-food jobs has been hailed as a landmark ruling akin to women winning equal pay.

THEY SAID IT: "A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool." - William Shakespeare

YOU SAID IT: Celebrating spring in autumn and Christmas in summer reflects a dissonance between tradition and our southern hemisphere seasons.

"Cannot agree more and imagine a long summer break with only new year to plan for ... heaven!," writes Dianne.

Robert writes: "Christmas in July? What drongo came up with that idea? If a Southern Hemisphere version of Christmas is needed that corresponds to the mid-winter northern hemisphere Christmas, it should be on June 25."

"Oh, I wholeheartedly agree with you," writes Chris. "Having Christmas in the middle of our summer break is far too stressful. In July we can sleep because the nights are cold. We can see everyone's Christmas lights at a reasonable time. I would much prefer July."

Maggie writes: "Because the vast majority of those who celebrate Christmas do it in mid-winter, some can't make the mental disconnection. I have met numerous Americans (admittedly not typically the most world-aware people) who assumed that we must celebrate Christmas in June or July."

"Let the religious folk do what they will and let the holidays happen on the solstices and equinoxes with a national day on the spring equinox," writes Martin.

Phil writes: "I tend to follow Scullard's 'Festivals and ceremonies of the Roman republic'. At least 10 feast days every month. We're just coming up to the seven-day festival of Ludi Megalenses. Even slaves were given some form of rest on festival days. I think that applies to wage slaves today."

"Couldn't agree with you more, John," writes Alison. "The sight of fake snow and rugged up Santas is especially ludicrous in the steaming tropics. As for Easter in autumn, it's always been a good time of year for spring cleaning, after the mess and mould of heavy wet seasons. Time we created new and more seasonally appropriate festivities, but people love Christmas so why not in July? One can always opt out."

Christopher writes: "The date for Christmas was decided by the Romans who thought the winter solstice occurred on December 25 December and it was a takeover of a pagan festival. Easter is also a take over of a pagan festival celebrating one of the many goddesses of fecundity, Eostre - the Christians didn't even bother changing the name of the festival. So if we're going to do Christmas at the right time of year, for God's sake, or the Roman's sake, do it in June not July at the time of the winter solstice. I celebrate my version of Easter on the first Sunday after the first full moon after the spring equinox, which in the Southern Hemisphere is around September 21, so Easter is usually early October."

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