As a psychologist, I’ve seen the real reason why women ‘don’t just leave’

July 23, 2026 — 11:00am

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I’m never so torn in my work as a psychologist as when a woman tells me their intention to leave an abusive relationship. Pauline Hanson has been widely condemned for suggesting on Wednesday that women should simply leave abusive relationships. Like much of Hanson’s politics, her latest kernel of wisdom offers a simplistic solution to a complex problem.

As someone who works with victim-survivors and perpetrators of domestic violence, I recognised Hanson’s words as reflective of a worryingly widely held opinion – men’s violence is viewed as a problem for women to solve, namely by leaving relationships. Missing from this commentary is the imperative for men to stop perpetrating abuse.

Hanson’s further comments about both men and women “losing their cool” in response to stressors such as cost of living externalises responsibility for abuse, simplifying and minimising the cause and impact of domestic violence. To borrow her language, men tend to “lose their cool” when women in abusive relationships do exactly as Hanson suggests – that is, leave.

Intended or actual separation is a significant risk factor for intimate partner homicide. In contrast to Hanson’s flippant........

© The Age