I am miffed at yet another cherished American institution that has fallen by the wayside. I’m talking about the Chinese fortune cookie.

My fetching daughter and recent college grad das Indy Pie and I supped with some Chinese takeout the other night. You know. Sodium. Pork. Sodium. Celery. Sodium. Onions. Orange teriyaki sauce. More sodium. Miss Indiana opened the most nihilistic fortune cookie. It read: “You need to work harder …” to which she immediately replied: “You need to shut the phu …”

Being the adept father, like Superman, arms outstretched, I flew across the dining room table with a cupped hand and held it over my daughter’s mouth before she could finish any proto-Teutonic procreational yoga wishes escaped from her dainty and proper Catholic lips.

“Excuse me?” she said. “I DO work hard.”

Indiana is, after all, her father’s daughter. Poor kid. This cookie prediction followed her working — not making this up — three 17-hour days in a row.

My talented offspring stumbled upon a 21st-century truism. Diners at Chinese restaurants still get the cheap but yummy crunchy sea shell-shaped cookie with the processed sugar and hint of fake vanilla. But. And the But’s big here. It’s no longer a fortune cookie. It’s an Inane, Well-Duh State The Obvious Cookie. FOR EXAMPLE:

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