French President Emmanuel Macron went to Vietnam to ink some massive deals – like a €9 billion Airbus order, which was supposed to be the centerpiece of the trip.

But before he could even set foot on Vietnamese soil, as the plane’s hatch opened, his wife Brigitte was caught on camera doing what can only be described as a vertical push-up right on Macron’s face.

At first glance, it looked like perhaps she was just trying to set the vibe for the visit, with a reenactment of what happened to the French the last time they got a little too confident in Vietnam. In any case, suddenly this image of the presidential couple had everyone zooming in like it was a lost Da Vinci.

Cue the Elysee’s damage control. First: It’s a deepfake. Then: The Russians did it. And finally: Okay fine, it’s real, but it’s just two people “decompressing.” Let the one among us who’s never “unwound” by shoving our spouse in the face cast the first baguette.

Final answer? Apparently so. A moment of complicity between longtime partners. Like a secret handshake. To the face. By the way, do the Elysee flaks themselves also count as conspiracy theorists? They’re the ones who cycled through every possible scapegoat short of blaming climate change –........

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