When my oldest child was 7, I wrote a Mother’s Day piece for Rewire News Group about motherhood, disability, and consent. In it, I argued that one of the most important things parents of children with disabilities can do is to think twice and ask for consent before sharing personal information, stories, or photographs about their child. 

I heard from so many disabled parents, who told me how much it meant to them that I talked about children’s privacy. 

That was eight years ago. Since then, I have continued to ask my children for their consent anytime I want to share something publicly about them or their experiences. 

Not all parents of disabled children share my view. In fact, oversharing about kids has become a lucrative trend on social media. And for a lot of us watching videos from parents of disabled kids, they feel like a modern-day version of the old circus “freak show.”

“Special needs mommy”

During the pandemic, when so many people were isolating at home with their families, the sheer amount of “special needs mommy” accounts seemed to grow exponentially.      

I have watched these special needs mommies—that is, nondisabled moms of disabled children—show pictures and videos of their kids in the hospital, zoom in on an overstimulated child having a meltdown, and share sensitive details about their kids’ day-to-day existence. 

I remember seeing one mom share a photo of her daughter and ask why her child wasn’t “skinny like those other girls” (with the same diagnosis). Another mom talked about how her son could never be a father because he used a wheelchair. 

These disclosures mainly happened in closed, disability-related Facebook groups, not in public fora. Still, all I could think is, How would that child feel, knowing how their mom talks about them? 

Not only are these parents’ comments hurtful, but they’re often inaccurate: They rely on stereotypes more at home in an old-school Jerry Lewis telethon than on Instagram in 2026. 

I worry about the long-term consequences of those childhood experiences being on the internet as these kids grow up. 

Maybe a romantic prospect will find a post when they’re doing a little pre-date background research—someone they really like but haven’t identified as disabled, or “disclosed to” yet. 

Maybe a prospective employee sees that a candidate used a feeding tube or an ostomy bag as a child and decides they do not fit the........

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