Derek yells at Maya while backing her into a corner and telling her she’s stupid, worthless, and a bad mother. Maya has heard this all many times before; this time, Derek won’t let up, and she feels afraid. Maya spaces out and cries softly, agreeing with whatever Derek says, waiting for him to run out of steam. Meanwhile, their two children are hiding in Maya's closet.

In this repeated scenario, Maya and the children start dissociating.

Dissociation has been described as "the essence of trauma" (Van Der Kolk, 2014). Dissociation has also been described as a broad range of alterations in memory, perception, attention, and consciousness (Herzog et al, 2019) that result from traumatic experiences.

But what does it feel like?

When you dissociate, you feel like you are disconnected from yourself or the world around you. You might experience an “out-of-body feeling.” You may have trouble remembering what happened during this time. Dissociation is being present but feeling absent—or being present but feeling numb.

Dissociation starts with an uncontrollable brain response to overwhelming events. If you have been through a prolonged or repeated trauma, dissociation might be your “superpower.” It helped you survive something unbearable. People learn to dissociate during child abuse, domestic violence, sexual assault, painful medical procedures, and similar experiences. If you dissociated in one situation or relationship,........

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