It's interesting to consider paths not taken in our lives.

Feelings about motherhood can shift over a lifetime without making a childfree life incomplete.

Developing a coherent life narrative, regardless of our specific circumstances, can be valuable.

“Mom, what would you have done if you didn’t have children?” I posed this question to my mother when in my early 50s, she in her 70s. What followed was my favorite conversation we ever had in our lifelong tense relationship.

She didn’t miss a beat, saying she’d have gotten a PhD. in English Literature in hopes of becoming a university professor. “That doesn’t mean I didn’t want you or your sisters,” she quickly added.

I liked that she could so easily envision a life without being a mother and told her so. In her moment of candor, she showed me a side of her character I’d never seen. I felt a tinge of acceptance as her only offspring who didn’t have kids and savored the undertone of regret I heard in her voice. She would have been a stern but dedicated educator.

What kind of mother might I have been had I........

© Psychology Today