My client, Jason, was distraught when his parents withdrew from him after his divorce. He sought counseling for support and ways to cope with this unexpected loss. When parents don’t support your divorce, at a time when you want and need their support, it can feel like a second betrayal, confusing and painful. I told Jason that he wasn't alone in this situation. As you face judgment, silence, or pressure from your parents during or after divorce, understanding why can help you manage your emotions and find your strength.

Here are some common reasons your parents might not ally with you.

1. They grew up with different values or beliefs.

Some parents come from backgrounds where divorce is taboo or morally unacceptable. They may see it as a failure rather than a solution, even if the marriage is deeply unhealthy. Divorce may clash with their cultural or religious values. They may say that marriage is “forever,” no matter how unhappy it becomes.

2. They

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