Why Relationships Matter

Take our Can You Spot Red Flags In A Relationship?

Find a therapist to strengthen relationships

Recently, I came across an outstanding book that combined two of my favorite topics: happiness and love. It's called ​How to Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More of What Matters Most​. And it can absolutely rock your world.

Two expert collaborators wrote it: Harry Reis, a longtime love researcher; and Sonja Lyubomirsky, a pioneering happiness researcher and Distinguished Professor of Psychology at UC Riverside.

For those of you who are not familiar with Lyubomirsky's work, she's kind of a big deal. She recently spoke on the TED Mainstage (​One Thing You Can Do to Be Happier​), had a ​profile​ in The New York Times Magazine, and had an ​article​ about How to Feel Loved in The New York Times on the book's launch day.

I sing the praises of this book because I believe it can change your life.

For those of you who read my book, ​The Tao of Dating: The Smart Woman's Guide to Being Absolutely Irresistible​, you may remember its central premise: fulfillment-centered dating. What you're actually seeking in a relationship is not some specific person, but rather a set of feelings that fulfill you. If you've ever been with the "right" person but still didn't feel the love, you know what I'm talking about.

That is precisely the topic Lyubomirsky and Reis tackle. In Lyubomirsky's own words:

My co-author and I spent 7 years reviewing decades of research in happiness science and relationship science, and we came to a simple but powerful conclusion: The key to happiness isn’t being........

© Psychology Today