Maybe she didn’t want to ‘shame’ her parents by running off with a man from another caste instead of the one they had picked for her—according to what police say she told them.

Maybe she just lacked the courage of her convictions.

Maybe her moral compass is so broken that she doesn’t see a difference between society’s disapproval and snuffing out a life.

Or maybe it’s something more basic: We don’t teach our daughters to say no.

From the time they are born, we teach them to adjust. To place family before self. To uphold family honour through compliance with the patriarch. To suppress individual desire in the larger interest of the family.

So much is not yet known about the murder of 25-year-old Ketan Agarwal, a Pune-based realtor. The plan was allegedly hatched and executed by his 20-year-old fiancé Siya Goyal and the man she is said to have been in a relationship with, 22-year-old Chetan Chaudhary. Police investigation into what was initially assumed to be an accidental fall during a trek at Lohagad Fort is still ongoing.

Ketan and Siya had met through a match arranged by their parents and were set for a destination wedding in November with a reported budget of ₹17 crore, two private planes to fly in guests, and a pre-wedding shoot in Bali.

Only one inconvenient fact: The bride was reluctant.

The uncomfortable truth is that for millions of young women, saying “no” to an arranged marriage is not........

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