This week, Glasgow’s voco Grand Central Hotel debuted an exclusive outdoor champagne bar in partnership with Veuve Clicquot. It’s constructed from half a dozen crisp white flower boxes linked together with brilliant golden yellow branded fencing. Inside, a few tables are organised around a single, proudly erected Veuve parasol.

The “newly unveiled experience” will be positioned at the hotel’s Gordon Street entrance when it officially opens in “Spring 2025”, “transforming the terrace into a sun-soaked, Riviera-inspired haven in the heart of the city centre”. Here in this “vibrant yet relaxed setting”, you can slurp down a £22 glass of Veuve Rosé while your partner rummages in his pocket for a couple of coins to share with a passer-by who needs 57p for the bus.

It’s perfectly suited for the “ultimate summer selfie”. Your carousel will come out looking like a Renaissance painting dotted with hi-vis clad police officers, disoriented tourists and the odd soul being sick next to a litter bin. The Instagram-worthy space has been “designed to evoke the glamour of a French summer”, complete with the pungent fumes bellowing out of Blue Lagoon, smokers’ mouths and the rail replacement buses. These scents mingle exquisitely with the sweet smell of Pineapple Ice vape clouds and urine. Oh, the soundtrack is even better. Groaning buses, wailing sirens, the odd smack of a fist making contact with a cheek.

It is, technically, the most dangerous part of Glasgow. Hundreds of crimes are recorded on........

© Herald Scotland