Scrolling through reviews of ‘best air conditioners for Ireland’ at 4.30am while sitting in your dew-drenched garden is a sure sign Cork is in the grips of a heatwave.

I find it very difficult to sleep when the nights are tropical. Our 1930s concrete block house is perfectly designed to absorb the heat of the sun and radiate it into bedrooms at night. Hence my pre-dawn wanderings in search of a cooling breeze.

I’ve been sleeping on the couch a lot lately and have the crick in my neck to prove it.

But you’re not really allowed to complain that it is too hot. Any mention that I’d “love a drop of rain” or a cloudy day where the thermometer dips below 20C is scoffed at.

Sure, wasn’t it raining for months on end. Stop grumbling and slap on the factor 50.

Yes, it’s nice to enjoy sunshine and warmth when the only decisions you have to make are whether to eat a 99 ice cream before or after a refreshing sea swim (always after!).

But I find it increasingly difficult to function when temperatures climb towards 30C.

Brain fog, crankiness, and indecision are all symptoms of my body under heat stress. Work and productivity are down the priority list. The most important thing my body wants is to cool down.

This column is coming to you thanks to a 9pm dunk in my kids’ paddling pool to revive my body, activate my temporal lobe and enabling me to bash out an opinion piece.

I’m fighting off........

© Evening Echo