My 13-year-old keeps saying she “doesn’t know who she is,” and she’s feeling lost. She has new clothes, new attitudes and new friends all the time. I want to guide her without controlling her. How do I help her find herself without pushing too hard? – Getting Whiplash

Getting Whiplash – I think this is going to call for a good balance in letting her discover who she is with trial and error and your help as her parent. I feel parents are a little bit too lenient with their kids in letting them discover who they are in today’s age. Our whole job is to guide and teach them how to be independent humans in the world. And they don’t know what they’re doing, so they need our help. Your daughter is going through all the things a new teenager goes through. Trying to discover where she fits in and what makes her happy. So, I suggest sitting down with her and making a list of her top three passions that she wants to try right now. Find those groups in the community and get her involved with like-minded people that will help her discover who she is. And be a........

© Yuma Sun