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Ali SolomonThe New Yorker : Daily Shouts |
A major milestone.
“Great Scott! The past is no longer distinguishable from the future.”
“No need to worry about our retirement funds—have you seen what these Trader Joe’s tote bags are reselling for?”
“Wow—I’d just assumed your profile picture was A.I.-generated.”
“Elon Musk says I have to justify my job, then forward his e-mail to ten federal employees, or I’ll have bad luck.”
“Super Bowl? This is just my regular comfort food these days.”
“My calendar’s pretty full, but I can squeeze you in between my post-holiday burnout and my midwinter blues.”
Blown away.
“It’s the sound of three million radiators simultaneously clanging to life.”
“I’m so tired, I’ll be asleep the minute my head hits the pillow, then awake again every hour filled with existential dread.”
”I am watching the Olympics—in between staying on top of the discourse!”
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