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KINSELLA: First known F-bomb in Canadian politics lobbed by Pierre Trudeau in 1971

Two Progressive Conservative MPs accused the prime minister of the day of mouthing the words 'f--k off' in the House of Commons

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If you are Canadian, and of a certain vintage, you know what that refers to: the F-word. F–k.

KINSELLA: First known F-bomb in Canadian politics lobbed by Pierre Trudeau in 1971 Back to video

It’s been around for a while, that word. The first recorded use of f–k came in 1528 when some anonymous monk wrote on the margins of a manuscript about (ironically) morality: “O D f–king Abbot.”

Was the Abbot the unhappy monk’s boss? Was the Abbot less-than-chaste? The answers to these and other critical questions have been lost to the mists of time. (The funny part? The “D’ refers to “damned,” which I can write in a family-friendly newspaper. The F-bomb? Can’t.)

I’m not going to get into what the word actually means, because it means what it has always meant, more or less. That is, what the Fourth Earl of Chesterfield described hereto: “The position is ridiculous, and the pleasure is momentary.”

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Deployed as a noun, verb, adjective or adverb

In many languages, it has been alternatively deployed as a noun, verb, adjective or adverb. It is a very, um, flexible word.

The first known Canadian use of it in politics is 1971, although Hansard (and history) record it as “fuddle-duddle.” Two Progressive Conservative MPs accused then-prime minister Pierre Trudeau of mouthing the words “f–k off” in the House of Commons, which he in fact had.

Delighted to have important policy to report on, journalists swarmed the Liberal leader.

Trudeau shrugged – naturally, obviously, of course he did – and said, enigmatically: “What is the nature of your thoughts, gentlemen, when you say ‘fuddle duddle’ or something like that?”

Pierre Trudeau: The only guy who can turn “f–k” into a Ship of Theseus Paradox, to wit: if all the parts of something are replaced, is the thing still the same thing? (Something like that.)

Trudeau got away with it, of course.

Eons later, his son Justin – who much later assumed the prime ministerial mantle, albeit not very well – cleared up any doubts: “I’ll tell you a secret: He didn’t actually just say fuddle duddle.”

F-word ubiquitous these days

No kidding, Just-o. Despite it being unparliamentary language, and despite it being frowned upon in (most) mixed company, f–k is f–king ubiquitous these days – including in politics, where it used to be a total f–king no-go zone.

The New York Times assigned five (5, yes) reporters/contributors to an investigative report about the subject of the F-word and politics, and they published their shocking results last weekend, including with handy colourful charts.

A summary of their Pulitzer-worthy probe:

– Lawmakers who use the F-word on X/Twitter the most? Democrats, hands down. GOP politicians aren’t even close. One Dem, Arizona Senator Ruben Gallego, has actually used it 77 times since 2020, and proudly so. Asked for comment, his bemused spox said: “(We will) just let his stats speak for itself.”

– The targets of the epithet vary. Most of the time, the Times found, the F-bomb gets dropped on the Trump administration. That is followed by thuggish (and sometimes homicidal) ICE and immigration actions. Republicans themselves come third. Representative sample, from (um) Representative Susie Lee of Nevada: “So f–king f–ked up. Sorry, I say f–k a lot these days.” Yes you do, Susie.

– The word is even showing up in paid advertising, down South. In February, a Democratic candidate for the Illinois Senate kicked off an ad with a delighted voter exhorting: “F–k Trump!” (We’d rather not, thanks much.)

– The most-notorious use of the word came recently, of course, when President Donald Trump posted: “Open the F–kin’ Strait, you crazy (Iranian) bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell – JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah.” Because Trump’s Truth Social platform is a bit of a dud, his post achieved only modest numbers there: 24,000 comments, 88,000 “hearts.” But elsewhere it made big boffo f–king news, around the world. Headlines aplenty. (And in Iran, too, we presume.)

Many politicians known to drop F-bombs but not Jean Chretien

Up here, as in all things political, we generally ape the Americans. In 1995, former Toronto mayor Mel Lastman told an opponent to go, you know, himself. In 2003, Conservative MP Cheryl Gallant said “f–k you” to other MPs, which she later characterized as “feel good.” Uh-huh.

Stephen Harper, when cross, said it a lot.

In 2004, when his staff weren’t up to snuff, the Tory PM said: “I want to know why nothing ever happens unless I use the word f–k!” It’s unclear what, if anything, his staff responded with. Likely not: “F–k you, sir.”

Brian Mulroney said it a lot. Paul Martin did, too. As his one-time special assistant, however, I can solemnly report that prime minister Jean Chretien never, ever said it or swore at all. He was a saint.

Besides, Mrs. Chretien would’ve f–king killed him.

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