I don’t mean to sound ungrateful about being on the “winning side” and witnessing the downfall of the axis of evil but, while the whole country kind of knew for some time that this was going to happen any day, the finance ministry, Bituach Leumi, the Bank of Israel and the education ministry seem to have been taken by surprise. While clemency is on the cards for some (no names mentioned), bankruptcy and repossession are the reward for others.

It’s honestly impressive. You’d think an entire nation living on push notifications, Home Front Command updates, and that one uncle who “has a guy in intelligence” would give the state a little head start. But no. The minute reality actually arrives, half the ministries respond like someone just walked into their office and whispered: “War. Now. Also, can you please file it in triplicate?”

We’ve been told for years that we’re a startup nation. Which is true, in the sense that every week we launch a new emergency framework, a new “temporary” regulation, and a new hotline that immediately plays you a recording saying “due to unusually high call volumes” in a tone that suggests this is a cosmic mystery. Unusually high call volumes. During a war. In Israel. Sure.

The Bank of Israel, bless its calm central-banker soul, has already put out an “assistance program” like it’s rolling out a festive holiday bundle. It’s got a name, too, because everything has a name now. Not “we are trying to prevent people from losing their homes,” but a branded operation, as if the economy needs a logo and a slogan. You can almost hear the meeting: “Great, we’ll freeze some payments, restructure some loans, and then, important, we need a heroic title. Something with an animal. Lions test well.”

Great, we’ll freeze some payments, restructure some loans, and then, important, we need a heroic title. Something with an animal. Lions test well.

Great, we’ll freeze some payments, restructure some loans, and then, important, we need a heroic title.........

© The Times of Israel (Blogs)