There is a particular pleasure in helping another person. Doctors, teachers, social workers, parents, friends, and volunteers can all experience the deep satisfaction of using their time and effort for someone else’s benefit. Service, one of the Four Traits, is the commitment to pursue that pleasure on purpose.

But experiencing the pleasure of service doesn’t make the pull toward self-centeredness disappear. The central question is: when I serve, who is at the center, the person being served or me?

A few months ago I........

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