Let’s step out from the darkness for just a moment and take a walk into the light. I want you to think of a sweet memory of your child from back in the day—one from the heart, a memory that makes you smile.

I know there’s a good chance you’re not ready to take in any type of happiness just yet. In fact, you may not be ready to do much of anything about your grief early on, which is common and understandable. If this sounds like you, maybe skip this story for now and return to it a little later, because I can guarantee your feelings will change.

I also realize this moment of bliss is now a double-edged sword that can also slice you open, but it’s important to focus on the good times we had with our children, even if it doesn’t always feel so good. We need to keep these happy memories alive.

I was about to suggest you start with a sort of time travel, but as I began to type those words, it took me back to a few weeks after Rob was born, so I guess I’ll go first. We had this great party in our apartment in Forest Hills, New York, and invited all of our friends and family to help us celebrate his........

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