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The Loneliness Hiding Behind the Filipino Smile

32 0
07.01.2026

When the U.S. Surgeon General declared loneliness a public health crisis in 2023, many assumed severe loneliness primarily afflicted isolated individuals in urban Global North cities. Yet some of the world’s loneliest people live in a country known for packed family homes, vibrant fiestas, and warm hospitality.

In the Philippines—where extended families share meals daily, church communities gather weekly, and people spend hours each day on social media—57% of citizens report feeling very or fairly lonely, according to Meta-Gallup’s 2023 Global State of Social Connections report, the second-highest rate globally. Separate surveys suggest Filipino youth are among the loneliest in Southeast Asia.

To understand this paradox, an eight-country qualitative study by the Annecy Behavioral Science Lab interviewed 50 Filipinos across age groups and loneliness levels. The findings reveal how a society celebrated for bayanihan—communal unity—can also produce deep, if often invisible loneliness.

“Disconnection is the unwillingness to connect anymore,” one participant explained. “Loneliness is invisible…we are good at hiding loneliness.”

That invisibility is culturally shaped. Filipino social life is guided by pakikipagkapwa, or relating to others as kapwa (shared identity), where social interaction is structured by whether someone is perceived as an insider (hindi-ibang-tao) or an outsider (ibang-tao) (Enriquez, 1978, 1994). Combined with sensitivity to hiya (a sense of propriety) and expectations of cheerfulness even during hardship, openly admitting loneliness can feel inappropriate.

As one young woman reflected, “I kept thinking, ‘Why would I feel lonely when I have so many great people around me?’ I knew that if I talked about it, some people—especially older ones—would just say it was all in my head.”

Participants often described lonely individuals as withdrawn or sad, yet quickly added that they........

© Psychology Today