Kindness at work can be trained, even if it doesn’t come naturally.

Reflecting on past kindness makes people more likely to repeat it.

Feeling cared for helps managers understand how to care for others.

Small shifts in behavior can transform an entire workplace culture.

Many leaders I meet share the same aspiration: They want their managers to lead with warmth, caring, and kindness. It sounds obvious—who wouldn’t want that? But here’s the uncomfortable truth: Not all people are naturally warm. Some are analytical, some are task-driven, some are simply reserved. Telling them to “be more caring” is about as effective as telling someone to “be taller.”

So the question becomes practical: Can you help managers, people, become more caring without trying to change who they are?

In my work leading a business with 25 managers, I’ve found that the answer is yes—but not by preaching values. Instead, we train attention.

Start With What Already Exists

Rather than asking managers to become different people, we ask them to notice something they already........

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