The Challenges of Divorce

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An adversarial process can harm parents and children. Most families do not need court.

Listening with curiosity before giving advice helps people feel grounded and reach their own insights.

Being prepared in a safe learning environment opens the mind to more possibilities during and after divorce.

This article is the second in a series that provides practical takeaways from three pioneers in family conflict resolution, who, through their decades of experience, have become internationally respected peacemakers and trainers of families and divorce professionals. Click here to read the first article.

Families of gray divorce, which refers to couples 50 and older, often become mired in conflict and struggle with effective communication. Family members can feel pulled to align with a parent or sibling. Not being able to listen to understand each other can lead to emotional outbursts, pain, anger, fights, and becoming estranged.

In recognition of Conflict Resolution Day, which is observed internationally on the third Thursday of October every year, and of the approaching holiday season that promotes giving thanks and peace throughout the world, I spoke with Jacinta Gallant, Canadian family lawyer, mediator, conflict educator, and international trainer.

A former client stopped Jacinta in a grocery store with words that show why her approach works. I’ll share them later in the interview.

Carol Hughes: Looking back over your career, what experiences or realizations led you to believe there was a better way for families to resolve the conflicts of divorce?

Jacinta Gallant: As a lawyer advocate, I had my share of “wins” and “losses,” but soon realized that most families lost in an adversarial justice system. I decided I could no longer use my talent to make things worse, so I........

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